TLDT c06s02
Text Fluttershy had been found early the next morning in the Everfree Forest, badly hurt. She was bleeding, and someone had left awful words scrawled all over her and cut into her body, and she had been... Scrivener shivered at the the thought as he sat in the library silently: Twilight had gone out to the pharmacy for him, but Rainbow Dash and Rarity were both here, the blue Pegasus trembling with anger and misery and Rarity looking with silent sympathy between her friends as she slowly sipped at a cup of tea. She had cups for them all, but Rainbow was trembling so badly she couldn't even pick hers up. That someone had hurt Fluttershy so badly... scrawled and cut and beaten and bloodied and assaulted her... and then... "I'm going to find them and kill them." Rainbow whispered, and Scrivener looked up silently as the Pegasus looked across at him, her magenta eyes burning with fury. "After what they did to her... I'm gonna find them and kill them." "Killing them won't solve anything." Scrivener said quietly, and when Rainbow glared at him furiously, he slowly brought his chestnut eyes up and murmured: "Killing them will make you feel better... for a little while. But what would Fluttershy want?" "They raped her! They shoved things in her, they cut her up!" Rainbow shouted angrily, leaping to her hooves and snarling as tears formed in her eyes. "I've been friends forever with her, what am I supposed to do, just-" "Killing them is one moment of fear, one moment of pain, one moment of everything, and then nothing." Scrivener said quietly, lowering his head, and the Pegasus fell silent before the earth pony closed his eyes and whispered: "You would be showing them mercy by just killing them, Rainbow Dash." "We need to think about what's best for Fluttershy." Rarity interrupted gently, looking worriedly between Scrivener and Rainbow Dash even as the Pegasus sat back and lowered her head, shivering a little but with a strange, almost-dark glow in her reddish eyes. "We need to look after her and take care of her first... if she's not okay, what would your revenge accomplish?" Rainbow grunted, then muttered: "It might save another pony's life... but... but I know. I know. I just... god..." Rainbow clenched her eyes shut, then she shook her head out and breathed slowly before looking over at Scrivener, asking finally: "And you really don't remember anything at all?" Scrivener looked away, and Rainbow frowned a little as Rarity gazed nervously over at the earth pony, before he lowered his head and whispered: "Just... madness. I guess when my head got... broken... hallucinations and nightmares filled in the blank gaps in memory. I... did you see Fluttershy and me talking?" "I... I don't remember, Scrivener, honestly. All I remember was that first Fluttershy left, and then you got up and left in a hurry after her, like you knew something was wrong. And then I just remember hearing a panic and..." Rainbow fell silent, shaking her head and clenching her eyes shut. "And Twilight can't help with magic or anything?" The charcoal stallion shook his head slowly, and Rainbow cursed under her breath before she looked slowly up, studying him silently. "I guess... you must have been hit hard. I mean, you're not some little pony... but Twilight was saying she spent most of the night picking bits of porcelain out of your mane, so... something must have smashed you through those sinks..." Scrivener only nodded slowly, looking down, and there was silence for a few moments before Rarity asked quietly: "I know this might not be the proper subject to ask about, but... the visions you had, Scrivener Blooms... what were they of? Maybe there's some clue there..." The charcoal stallion grunted, looking down and muttering: "I doubt it... but... well..." Scrivener hesitated, and then he sighed and shook his head slowly, murmuring: "I saw blood first. I stepped it in, felt it on my hooves... and when I threw open the door, I saw this... this tunnel. Of flesh, and... machinery and..." He shivered a bit, looking down and whispering: "It was like Clockwork World, but worse. Alive. And Fluttershy was being dragged off by... by this thing. This gigantic monster, and she was bruised and screaming for help, and I... I ran forwards, but then the ceiling collapsed in front of me and blocked my path, and I started hitting the barrier and..." He petered out, trembling for a moment before swallowing thickly and murmuring: "And that was when you found me, Rainbow. And the moment I hear your voice, I look around, and I'm just in a bathroom and I'm punching the wall, not..." Rainbow looked down silently as Rarity shivered a little, and there was quiet for a few moments before Scrivener grasped his own cup of tea in front of him, and hurriedly gulped the contents down. Then, finally, the Pegasus looked up and asked quietly: "Could it have been real? The... the monster, I mean." "Then how would it have escaped? It was... it was huge." Scrivener shivered a bit, shaking his head slowly before he grimaced as he remembered the wrecked state of the bathroom. "I just... Fluttershy told me..." Both ponies looked at him... but a moment later, there was a click before Twilight entered the library, a satchel hanging at her side as she gazed softly towards Scrivener. Scrivener smiled faintly, glancing up at her before the violet unicorn looked almost nervously at Rarity and Rainbow Dash. "Sorry I took so long, I... I stopped in to see Fluttershy, too. She's... she's not doing too well. How are you holding up, puddin'?" Scrivener shrugged after a moment, feeling a moment of awkwardness before Twilight Sparkle nodded slowly again and then sighed a little, saying apprehensively: "Look, I... I know you hate this idea already, Scrivy, but... I would really like to talk to Celestia about this, maybe even visit Canterlot. She might be able to reach further into your mind than I can..." "I... I'll think about it, Twilight. But... my mind might not be able to handle that, either." Scrivener murmured, shaking his head and looking down as he closed his eyes. "We'll find who did this though, one way or another." "I know, puddin'. I know we will, and... we're gonna make sure Fluttershy gets through this, too." Twilight said softly, striding over to him and leaning down to kiss his lips gently, and Scrivener blushed a bit even as he returned the affection before giving an embarrassed, apologetic smile to the other ponies. "Oh, I got your medication. Take your pain pills, then go and lie down... your eyes are all bloodshot." "Yeah." Scrivener said finally, as Twilight used telekinesis to draw a bottle of medication out of her satchel, and the earth pony sighed as he took this before nodding to Rarity and Rainbow Dash, turning to head for the stairs. He made his way up to Twilight's room, wondering absently for a moment where Spike was before he crawled into bed and dismissed it: this morning, he'd found what looked almost like a tent in the back room on his old futon. Spike was perhaps not entirely pleased with Scrivener now being more than just a tenant and all, but it looked like the dragon was also going to make the most of it as well. The charcoal stallion popped the pill bottle open, glanced at the label, then shrugged and simply shook a few pills out into his mouth after he recognized the medication. He took three: not to deal with the throbbing pain still running through his body, but instead in the hopes it would help knock him out, before he laid himself down on the bed, closed his eyes, and curled up to try and get a little bit of sleep. But he remained wide awake, even as the pain went away completely... and after forty minutes, he was joined by Twilight Sparkle, who slipped into bed with him and pushed her face against his chest. He held her closer, rubbing a hoof slowly along her side before she murmured quietly: "I love you, Scrivener. And I want you to know that... I'm so proud of you. Even if you didn't save Fluttershy... you tried your hardest to." "But I didn't save her." Scrivener said quietly, looking down, and Twilight shook her head slowly before she leaned up and gently kissed his cheek. "You did everything you could, for a pony you barely know. You're brave, Scrivener..." Twilight nuzzled him soothingly, rubbing a hoof along his chest before she gently pushed him onto his back, slowly straddling him as she breathed a little harder and murmured softly down to him: "I admire that, puddin'. You're so strong... such a powerful, handsome pony... but you have that dark side too, yeah?" She rubbed her hooves up along his chest, and Scrivener swallowed awkwardly, body tingling even as he mumbled: "Not... not now, Twilight... this... this isn't right and I really want to just rest for a while..." "Come on..." Twilight leaned forwards, hooves playing slowly up his chest as she half-lidded her eyes. "Tell me what you'd do to the monster that did this, then... tell me how you'd make them hurt... 'cause you want to make them hurt, don't you? You want revenge..." "Twilight!" Scrivener reached up to push at her, but she caught his front hooves with her own, their eyes locking as she breathed hard and he shivered a bit. "Twilight, come on, this isn't-" "Isn't exciting enough? Isn't good enough? Scrivener, I know you want it..." Her eyes half lidded as she gyrated her hips, and Scrivener grunted and ground his teeth painfully together. "I can... feel... how much you want it, puddin'. Because you're my black knight... you're my handsome beast, right? And I'm here to give you what you want, give you release, take away the real world but give you something even better, even greater than the delusions and fantasies..." She leaned down, breathing out over his face, and Scrivener shivered before, with what felt like monumental effort, he finally managed to shove her off before rolling out of bed and whispering hurriedly: "I need to go for a walk." "Wait!" Twilight shouted almost desperately, half-rolling towards him and reaching up a hoof, but Scrivener ignored her as he hurried to the door and down the stairs... and then stared stupidly as he stumbled into the main room of the library and found... Twilight Sparkle? The violet mare looked at him with worry and confusion, putting aside several files as she asked in concerned voice: "Scrivy? Are you okay?" "I... I..." Scrivener stared at her, jaw dropped, eyes wild... and then he spun around and hurried back up the stairs to the bedroom, staring into it and then moaning low in his throat as he saw it was empty, wondering what the hell had just happened before he staggered forwards when Twilight's hoof gently touched him. He whirled around in a circle, and Twilight winced before the charcoal stallion trembled, mouth working weakly. Then she frowned and leaned towards him nervously, studying his eyes before she murmured: "Okay. It's okay. Let's get you to bed, Scrivy..." "I... I saw you, and you were... all over me, and I ran away and..." Scrivener babbled, shaking his head stupidly, and Twilight only looked at him with soft concern as she gently pushed him into bed, carefully helping tuck him in before the stallion curled up and grabbed at his skull, whispering: "What's happening to me..." "Scrivener, you had a concussion, your skull was fractured... and knowing you, you probably just took a bunch of painkillers without reading the label. All that, and the fact you have... trouble sometimes... telling fantasy from reality..." Twilight hesitated, then she slipped into bed with him... but instead of curling up beside him, she gently pulled her head up against her chest, nuzzling quietly into his bandaged scalp. "I'm here, okay? I'm here for you, to help you out every step of the way. I love you very much and I'm going to protect you and watch over you, so just... just try and sleep, Scrivy. Try and sleep." The charcoal stallion could only tremble, staring blankly at the ceiling as he breathed hard in and out, resting back against her and feeling almost maternal love coming from her now instead of sexual, heavy passion. And for an hour or so, he simply laid back against her comforting form, until finally he felt some semblance of sanity finally return to him. But it felt like he was on a seesaw for most of the day, slowly tilting back and forth between madness and sanity as he heard inaudible whispers, had bouts of paranoia, felt anxiety creeping and crawling along his spine the entire day, like ghostly fingers that wanted to keep him constantly tense. He found himself questioning himself, questioning the ponies around him, questioning reality itself as Twilight did everything he could to help keep him stable. Time became hard to tell, as Scrivener found himself unable to sleep at all: not because of the pain, because he was scared of the nightmares that might come. But the only time he felt comfortable, all the same, was when he was curled up in bed with Twilight against him... and his eyes closed, so they couldn't play tricks on him. He still heard whispers, but they were easier to deny, easier to ignore than the other sights and sounds that sometimes threatened him... It wasn't until a few days later, after Scrivener and Twilight went to Canterlot for his regularly-scheduled meeting with Dr. Sanus, that Scrivener finally felt his sanity beginning to return. As he sat in the psychiatrist's office, Sanus looking at him meditatively and slowly tapping a hoof on the police report he'd left out on his desk, Scrivener swallowed... and then he simply blurted out the events of what had happened in a jumbled rush, starting from the conversation at the bar and ending with his hallucination of Twilight. Sanus had been surprised by his honesty and thoroughness, but had listened intently, likely realizing that if he asked Scrivener to stop the charcoal stallion might simply bottle everything up again. Finally, when Scrivener rambled to the end of his long spiel, the psychologist had been silent for a few moments before he leaned forwards and said quietly: "You must be scared as hell if you're coming to me for help." Scrivener simply nodded silently, and Sanus sighed for a moment, sitting back and gathering his thoughts before he closed his eyes and rubbed a hoof against his features. "You present me with a problem. On the one hoof, your hallucinations and paranoia are both worsening and growing more frequent. If we look at your behavioral patterns and match that to your psychological history, it looks like you're on the edge of another breakdown... which would be a sign that you should be reevaluated again, and perhaps spend some time at the facility under observation. "On the other hoof... you only really started to improve once out of the facility. You see this place as a hostile environment instead of a safe place, and it makes it very hard for us to treat you while you're here. And even if you're having hallucinations more frequently... your willingness to question their reality, to try and understand they are not real, they are not part of your delusions... it shows your ability to separate fantasy from reality is growing and improving." Sanus looked across at the earth pony quietly, giving a small smile. "It may not be comforting, but your discomfort, your anxiety... it may come from your mental health improving instead of further deteriorating." "Then why the hell would anyone want to be healthy if it means I lose the ability to believe in all my wonderful little fantasies and instead get stuck with trying to live through a life of pain?" Scrivener asked pessimistically, and Sanus shook his head slowly with that same wry smile. "You're in the desert now, Scrivener Blooms. It will be a long, difficult, and painful trek, but ultimately it will take you away from your mirages and delusions and into the real world. You just need to get there." The doctor hesitated, and then the unicorn reached down and pulled open a drawer before removing a large sheaf of papers, beginning to flip through them as he muttered: "Let's see..." Scrivener tilted his head, and then the psychologist nodded slowly, tapping a name. "I'm prescribing you a drug called 'Ultinsiolisashin,' commonly referred to as ULT. It's exceedingly toxic and made for short term use only: the chemical compound comes from poison joke extract, among other things. You'll need to strictly follow the instructions that come with it and only take it for two weeks, otherwise you run the risk of damaging your blood vessels and nervous system. At that point, we'll leave you off for a day or two while we evaluate how you handled the drug, and then either run a second course or switch to something gentler." Scrivener grimaced at this, making a face as Sanus continued: "I have faith you'll be able to tolerate it and the side effects well, but I'm going to prescribe some medications for the nausea I have no doubt you'll get, too. The reason I'm giving you this is because it should stave off your hallucinations and anxiety." "There is one side effect that I am a little concerned about, however..." Sanus looked up, meeting Scrivener's eyes as he said quietly: "ULT has been known to cause aggression. You are not a pony I want to encourage to be aggressive for any period of time." Scrivener nodded nervously, rubbing slowly at the back of his neck before he asked finally: "Then why give me it at all?" "Because if we can stave off the hallucinations, your mind may adjust to the real world. You may be able to actually start finding yourself able to sort delusion from memory in your mind and, in the best case scenario, you'll be able to find your real memories of Luna." Sanus responded quietly, and then he shook his head slowly. "I believe that the... most serious hallucination you described, of your friend being dragged off by that monster... that was your mind's way of filling in the blanks, just as it filled in an entire world for you while you were out of your mind with despair over what happened to your fiancee. But your mind's ability to produce delusions, to make you believe in this non-reality, has weakened. The only reason it happened again at all is because you took a blow to the head that likely caused some short term memory loss." The charcoal stallion nodded slowly, looking down before the doctor asked quietly: "But I am curious. Doing this... it put you at great personal risk. Not just your physical well-being, but getting involved in this confrontation meant risking being immediately taken back to this institute for reevaluation and holding, and from all accounts you have had very little contact with the victim involved before this. Why risk your life for hers?" "Because it was the right thing to do. Because Luna would have wanted me to. Because... she was my friend, I guess. And whether I knew her or not, she was also someone I had written about in my delusional world..." Scrivener smiled faintly. "Maybe it was really just veiled self-preservation. Trying to save her to cling to... fantasy." He stopped, then looked down and closed his eyes. "And Luna was my wife. Whether we were married or not... she was my wife, my soulmate, my everything." Sanus sighed a little, but then the unicorn nodded a bit before he asked quietly: "And what about your current relationship, Scrivener Blooms, with Twilight Sparkle? Would you like to touch on that subject? It sounds like it's a source of stress for you as much as one of comfort, after all, because of this deep love and attachment you still have for Luna." "She calls me 'puddin'' a lot. It creeps me out and I can't quite explain why." Scrivener mumbled, and Sanus smiled wryly. "And this isn't her first relationship but... she acts almost like it is sometimes. Or... I dunno. It's... it's hard to explain, because she makes my anxieties act up, but at the same time she doesn't. It's not like with other people, who I get suspicious and paranoid about... it's more like... concern. Worry." Sanus simply nodded, and Scrivener let himself continue to ramble out, knowing that he was falling into the simplest of all psychologist traps: the long silence, which he himself was now filling with his chatter. But at the same time, for the first time, Scrivener also didn't feel like it was a trap or like the doctor was against him... for the first time, he was willingly divulging all this information because it felt like Sanus actually might be able to help him... like maybe he didn't have to actually deal with all this alone. It was the first time the session actually went over the time limit... and Sanus finally had to stop Scrivener, standing up on the other side of his desk and saying quietly: "I'm afraid we're long out of time, Scrivener Blooms, but... we can revisit this subject next week. Oh, here's your prescription... and Scrivener, try and remember one thing: as you get more in touch with the world, you're going to have a lot of strange feelings. But this is natural, and it may take some time before you understand what these... emotions and signals are all adding up to. But they will add up, I promise." Sanus paused, then he held a hoof out over his desk, and Scrivener looked surprised for a moment, and almost suspicious. But after a few moments, he rose his own hoof and carefully took the psychologist's, shaking it slowly and saying finally: "Thank you." "No, Scrivener, thank you." Sanus gave a small, dry smile. "I have a two year bet running with the other doctors that I can fix you, one way or another. You may make me a rich pony shortly... as long as we continue to get you feeling better." Scrivener laughed despite himself, and then he nodded and smiled, turning away and saying over his shoulder as he headed for the door: "Then let's hope I don't have to fake being sane for very long, huh?" The charcoal stallion pushed open the door and let himself out, feeling... almost light on his hooves as he stepped into the waiting room outside. He smiled at the sight of Twilight Sparkle, who gazed up at him softly before he nodded once to her, studying her piercings, her spiky mane, her warm, caring eyes... "Let's go." Twilight smiled warmly in return, and the two ponies traced the familiar route out of the building in comfortable silence. But as they headed through the gates and out to Canterlot's streets, Scrivener impulsively turned and kissed her firmly, and the violet mare's eyes widened in surprise... then closed slowly as she returned it, smiling in delight before their mouths parted and she let out an almost dreamy pant, and Scrivener murmured softly: "I'm lucky to have you. I love you, Twilight Sparkle. I honestly do." Twilight gazed at him radiantly, her eyes almost shining as their irises locked... and then she laughed brightly and hopped forwards, shoving up against him, the two almost running down the street together side-by-side, content and free. Scrivener let himself relax, let the enjoyment simply be for this moment in time, as instead of heading straight home, they wandered through Canterlot together, enjoying the sights and sounds and turning this usually-feared trip into a little getaway from everything for themselves. It was evening before the two ponies made it back to Ponyville, both in high spirits still, Scrivener feeling better than he had in days. They found a note from Spike saying that Fluttershy had woken up, and Rarity had taken him to see her... and while both Scrivener and Twilight wanted to rush to the Pegasus, they also didn't want to overwhelm her, and that by now visiting hours were likely over anyway. Where Spike was now, Twilight didn't know... but that was okay. If he was with her friends, then she knew he was fine... and she smiled softly across at Scrivener Blooms, and Scrivener Blooms smiled back at her as they shared a light salad together. She had more than enough to keep her entertained. That night, they slipped up to the bedroom, and Twilight closed her eyes and reveled in bliss as Scrivener made love to her. Romantic, gentle, passionate... it was good, and she loved every moment of it. And when it was over, him breathing hard, body resting overtop hers, his weight so comforting, still feeling his strength thrumming in his muscles as her hooves played slowly along his body, she leaned up and whispered quietly: "I'm yours, Scrivener. I'm all yours. Forever and forevermore..." Scrivener smiled softly, kissing her ear, her cheek, her lips... and later, as the two curled together, Twilight half-asleep and the male dozing a bit as he held her close, he couldn't help but ask quietly: "Twilight... don't you ever worry about... about what could happen if..." "No." Twilight closed her eyes, snuggling tighter into him as she murmured: "No, I don't worry about anything, Scrivy. Not anymore... because you're here with me, aren't you? You're here with me, and I'm all yours... forever. And you know..." She looked up at him softly, reaching up and stroking under his muzzle gently. "I'm... I'm willing to do anything for you. Absolutely anything for you... I want to experience the world with you. I want to share everything with you... I want you to be happy, first and foremost, because when you're happy, I'm happy, puddin'. So don't be scared of telling me what you want. If you want to try something different, or if you have anything in mind. I'm here for that... I'm yours, all yours..." Scrivener smiled down at her as a thrill of both interest and worry twisted through him, trying to drown out selfish more-primal instincts as he leaned forwards and nuzzled her quietly, and then he asked finally: "And what are you going to do when I do ask you one day to do something that no sane pony would be comfortable with?" Twilight grinned up at him, and Scrivener stared a bit at the almost-hungry expression on her features as her eyes half-lidded, hooves stroking slowly down his body as she said teasingly: "Then why don't I show you some of the things I'm willing to do for you, Scrivener Blooms..." "Uh, Twilight... Twilight, that's very nice and all but, uh... T-Twi..." Scrivener's protests were cut off as his eyes rolled back on his head as Twilight descended, a pulse of pleasure running through him as he stared at the ceiling and mumbled incoherently as his body reacted to her eager ministrations. When morning came around, Scrivener awkwardly, carefully slipped out of bed, still feeling a little dazed as he carefully made his way to the stairs and down them. He rubbed slowly at his face, feeling both embarrassed and... eager, in a word. Upstairs, Twilight was still sound asleep, and had likely... worn herself out... so she would probably remain asleep for another hour or so... Scrivener smiled a bit as he made his way towards the kitchen, even as an odd chill ran down his spine. Yes, they were still in that phase where their love was new, they were both ponies who had gone quite a while without any sort of sexual contact, and Twilight was doing her whole... trying to please him thing... but he was sure it would all find some semblance of normal sooner or later. And even if it didn't, what was there to complain about? Sex, romance, love, friendship... they took care of each other, watched over each other, and did things for each other... so... why did these positive things give him such a feeling of... strangeness? Scrivener only shook his head, thinking of what the doctor had said, of what he knew himself to be true... that he was still clinging to his memories of Luna, that he was still having trouble letting go of the past, knowing real from fantasy, and it was all... stirring things around in his head. And maybe the whole thing with Fluttershy... Scrivener lowered his head as he stood in the kitchen, then he nodded slowly, murmuring quietly: "I should go and see her. Maybe if I talk to her, maybe if I can help her... then I can start settling these bad feelings I've been having. Maybe..." He only shook his head, then sighed and did his best to shake off his worries, trying to convince himself none of it was important. To seize this second chance at life for what it was: happy, lucky, and wonderful, not something to be scared of, to feel paranoia over... and yet all the same, his fears remained, and it was more than just nervous anxiety that twisted its way through his mind and heart and soul. Top ↑ Category:Transcript Category:Story